New Reality TV: Ignoramus No More
1. The program finds the most stupefied, addled, ignoramus available. This should not be difficult. Find someone who went to a public (statist) school, watches hours of TV a day, plays video games endlessly, listens to rap, and is addicted all manner of popular culture. Igoramus must be of average intellilgence (insofar as that is possible to ascertain).
2. Isolate Ignoramus from all popular culture for three months. A special compound will be built for this task.
3. Make Ignoramus read challenging books by classic authors such as Augustine, Aquinas, Plato, Aristotle, Descartes, Dostoevsky, T.S. Eliot, C. S. Lewis as well as the entire Bible. He keeps a running vocabulary book, writing down and defining words he does not know. The book will likely contain hundreds of entries. He must also memorize key passages from this literature.
4. Ignoramus must spend long periods of time not sleeping, not meditating (in the Eastern sense) not reading, not exercising, but sitting and thinking.
5. Ignoramus must listen to audio courses on things he knows nothing about: Western civilization, the history of philosophy, and the history of art.
6. Ignoramus is tutored by experts in the above subjects. He must write papers on these subjects and pass oral examinations on them as well. No multiple choice or true/false examinations will be given.
7. Ignoramus is given lessons in speaking well. His present vocabulary is expunged of "I mean," "you know," "um," "awesome," and other emotive vacuities. Instead, he learns how to speak in complete sentences with aptly chosen words, spoken at the proper time.
8. After this three-month immersion, Ignoramus gives a one hour speech on prime time TV concerning the results of his immersion into this strange world of learning.